Most people don’t put thought into forming friendships and let friendships move along organically. Certain friendships progress while others die away because of lack of chemistry, or whatever mystical force that makes friendships thrive.
Sometimes we hang out with a friend a feel uplifted by their positive attitude while on the other hand a more negative friend brings down everyone around them.
Nothing wrong with not being sunny all the time, but there is a limit to pessimism where it becomes toxic.
Of course, it’s important to express negative feelings and vulnerability in friendships because otherwise no one will really know you. What I’m talking is general day-to-day attitude.
While we spend a lot of time trying to cultivate our own optimistic views (don’t cry over spilled milk and all that). We don’t think that deeply about how others views so easily infiltrate our minds, especially those others who we spend significant time with.
As we speak, read, and listen to the people we spend the most time with their views and attitudes most definitely influence our own.
A lot of this happens on Facebook since these days’ people don’t actually spend that much face to face.
Go scroll through your Facebook and see what your friends post.
Is it positive? Is it useful?
Most of it is probably positive because that’s what Facebook is for, right? Glossing over any less than perfect of our lives.
But you can see the general attitude when someone posts all those bedraggled mom comics about how awful having kids is.
Nothing wrong with laughing at parenthood, it’s completely necessary if you want to survive it.
What I’m talking about is the general attitude that having kids is the worst thing that happened to us.
I’m sure you know parents like that. And honestly, I don’t blame them. For whatever reason our culture has spread this attitude via the most popular entertainment medium of our time: television.
You see this on shows like Catastrophe and Togetherness. Or you can just read about it in this article.
Honestly, I can’t really watch these shows they’re just too much of a downer.
Our culture seems to be on a negativity kick when it comes to parenting. Many people seem to be parroting the speech they see in the media without really thinking.
Parents are not at fault here, it’s hard to fight these images we get blasted with. Most parents are new at this and don’t really know how they are supposed to act so they mimic media stereotypes.
So as you wrap up this homeschooling year (congrats to you!). Start thinking about the next year, start thinking about what you want your year to look like. Are there certain friends that hinder instead of help your goals?
Actually not just friends, really any media you consume or interact with. Blogs, books, shows, etc.
The people and things we interact with influence us a great deal, if you are always with the mom that’s making snide comments about her kids or just plain exasperated at her life, it’s going to rub off on you.
You might think at the end of the night, “Ugh I can’t believe I have to listen to these kids again, I wish I could just (insert favorite activity here)”.
We all have these thoughts, but they aren’t useful and if we’re not careful they grow.
So especially for homeschooling moms who are in the home stretch of the year, make sure to be careful about what you read and who you interact with.
Is this a positive impact on my life? Is this useful?
Good questions to keep in mind.
I’ll be trying to this coming summer, (most likely forgetting). Hopefully we can remind each other.